It is to say it all, listening to it all.
Communicating means expressing yourself and to be open to listen.
This week I had the opportunity to work with a group of women that has been severely abused physically, verbally and psychologically in the city of Plymouth, IN. The theme of my workshop was “Giving and receiving feedback” and my intention was not only to show to these women that healthy communication is possible among people but also to bring awareness about how much all of us, in different moments of our days, can cause come kind of impact on other people around us.
The question is: do we know exactly what reaction our words have on others? Do we know what people feel when we express ourselves? Do we really know how to listen to what people have to say? 100% of the people in the group I worked with said they didn’t. At the end of the workshop, all of them showed a better level of awareness and understanding about the responsibility we all have in relation to what we say to others, especially when these people are our loved ones, family members, precious friends and co-workers.
Communicating means expressing yourself and listening; it means expressing yourself and letting others express themselves too. It means listening to you, listening to the other person and often checking if what is being said and heard is correct.
A lot of the difficulties found in relationships happen because the communication flow is not effective and we are not really sure that what we said was understood.
Why is it so difficult for parents to listen to their children? The feeling I get is that most parents think they have to do something, take some action, and obtain some result or an immediate solution when their kids try to tell them something. In fact, all our children want is to feel listened to. We all have the power to choose to start a war or to make Peace. We can choose to just listen and connect with our children or to get into a conflict with them when trying to find a solution that pleases us.
Listening gives us the opportunity to feel empathy for others. Empathy means putting yourself in someone else’s place. Feeling empathy is the key, in my opinion, for healthy and honest relationships with ourselves and others. Empathy cures, nourishes, feeds our soul.
Children need and must be listened to. We can learn so much from what they have to say. And, most important of all, is to be sure that when we do express ourselves, we are causing a positive impact on someone else’s life. We need to make sure that when we express ourselves, we are making someone’s life happier. And hopefully, this same person will do the same.